Access is a public trust, held on behalf of two children, and it has to be earned in the world where actions have weights.

I have not forgiven my mother.

I may, someday; I don’t know.

But whether I forgive her and whether she is allowed near my sons are two entirely different questions, and I will never again let anyone collapse them into one — least of all out of a son’s old hunger to believe his mother is better than her choices.

Then I went back to the only work that mattered, which was the plainest work there is: showing up.

I went to the Little League games.