And I would carry it again, gladly, a thousand times over, because the alternative was a world without Noah in my life, and that was no alternative at all. and I began the strange second motherhood that would take up the whole rest of my life.

For ten years, it was just the two of us.

I want to be honest about how hard those years were, especially at the beginning, a woman of my age with an infant, the sleepless nights, the money that never quite stretched, the grief that would ambush me in the cereal aisle or at the sound of a song.

But I want to be even more honest about this: those ten years were also the greatest gift of my life.

Because in raising Noah, I got to keep a piece of Chloe.