And then she gave me the third reason, which she had not prepared and which came out badly and which I believe is the true one.

She said: “And by the summer, when the photograph came — by then I’d already done it once.

“That’s the part nobody tells you.

The first time, I had a reason.

It was a bad reason but it was a reason and I stood in a doorway and used it.

“After that there wasn’t a decision to make anymore.

There was only the question of whether to tell you what I’d done in February.

And every month that went by, that got bigger, and the baby stayed the same size.”

She looked at her hands.

“By the time he was one I wasn’t hiding a grandchild from you.