And three people at a grief group that met on Thursday evenings in the basement of a Lutheran church on Mineral Point Road.

I went to that group for nine months.

Eleven of us at the largest, four at the smallest.

Perinatal and infant loss.

A facilitator named Bridget who was a volunteer and had lost a daughter in 2009.

And in that basement I said, out loud, more than once, in a circle of people who had all lost a child, that my son had died on the table and that I had never seen him.

Those people arranged themselves around that.