Part Thirty-Six: Was This What It Came To

I lay back against the pillows taking air in and out in big ragged pulls, with tears making my eyes burn.

Was this really where all of it ended up?

Ten years of fighting for this, and I could not even get out of bed and go after my own husband.

I could not go and collect him and put him in front of me and make him look.

I had two babies who needed me, in a body that had stopped taking instructions.