I need you to show up on time when you say you will.

I need you to be a good father to them.

I need you to speak to me respectfully when a decision affects us both.” He looked at the pavement.

“You know that’s not what I meant.” “I know,” I said.

He had wanted me to declare that I was entirely self-sufficient, that I no longer needed his existence at all — because that was a loss he understood, a clean severance he could grieve and resent.

But total independence had never been the thing between us.