“You told me to keep standing, Julian,” I said, leaning in close, so that only he could hear it.

“On that platform, in the cold.

You thought it was funny.

Well.” I let him see my face, calm and clear and entirely his equal.

“I am standing.

On my own two feet.

With my baby, and my dignity, and your entire life in my hands.” Julian opened his mouth, but no words came out, because there were none left for him anywhere.

I chose those words with care, in the days I spent waiting at the estate, because I wanted them to close the circle exactly.