Either way I intend to keep showing up, to keep speaking honestly, to keep answering the phone.

The outcome is not mine to control.

Only the staying is.

And the staying, at last, is the part I have decided to be good at.

Chapter 18 — What I Am Thinking

Sometimes Rosalie catches me watching her across a room with a quiet expression, and asks me what I am thinking.

And I always tell her the truth, because I have sworn off, for the rest of my life, the particular arrogance of hiding what I feel behind competence and silence.

“I’m thinking,” I tell her, “about how close I came to letting my own foolish pride destroy the most beautiful life I could ever have known.”