Now I wanted to remember that Henry needed green pencils because the blue ones made his drawings feel too cold.

Parenting with Lauren required learning a new kind of negotiation.

We argued about screen time, the boys’ school, how to respond when they fought, and whether my weekend activities were too elaborate.

When I suggested taking them to a private island for spring break, she laughed once, then saw I was serious.

“They want to go camping,” she said.

“With tents and mosquitoes and burnt marshmallows.

They don’t need an island.”