I Was Told My Newborn Had Died—Then My Eight-Year-Old Son Asked Why Daddy Had Paid Aunt Rachel to Take the Crying Bundle
The first feed did not become a perfect scene.
I had to adjust my position.
Something I needed was on the wrong side of the room.
I realized I had put a clean cloth away too neatly to find it quickly.
A person helping us that day brought it over without making me feel incapable.
I thanked them.
For weeks, help had been associated in my mind with Mark taking control of information.
I needed to learn the difference between somebody doing a task beside me and somebody deciding I should not know what the task was.