The man standing in front of me seemed to understand that partnership was not a special favor.

That night I asked Marian whether she had been comfortable.

“Yes,” she said.

“And I’m pleased you went out.

You looked lighter when you came home.”

I realized that protecting her and protecting myself were not opposite goals.

A family could make room for both, provided nobody insisted that one person’s needs had to erase another’s.

On Monday I blocked out another afternoon in my calendar.