Over the next month, Pamela tried to reach me repeatedly — texts, mutual friends, letters from her relatives — and her explanations shifted constantly, in a way that told its own story.

First she claimed Hannah had grossly exaggerated the whole interaction.

Then she insisted her request for Hannah to stay in the room had been purely temporary, a small thing blown out of proportion.

Finally, she argued that every healthy marriage simply required a wife to be her husband’s absolute first priority, above all else, including his child.

Three incompatible defenses, each abandoned the moment it failed, offered by a person who cared only about being exonerated and not at all about what had actually happened to a little girl.

I responded exactly once, through my family lawyer. No real adult partnership, the letter read, requires humiliating a young child or erasing the memory of her deceased parent. After that notice was delivered, the direct communication stopped.