I do not think it is a place I am capable of reaching, and I have decided I am glad of that — that there are doors in the human soul I will never be able to open, and that my mother’s ability to open them is a sickness in her and not a wisdom I lack.

She was not stronger than me for being able to do it.

She was emptier.

It only looked like strength from underground.

Chapter 16 — They Split the Money

Something in me that had been grief turned, in that moment, entirely to something else.

Colder.

Steadier.