The underlying question remained, but I was left holding it alone.

This question had dates and copies and a written response requested from people outside our marriage.

It could not be made to disappear merely by changing the tone.

The separation discussions were harder in a different way.

My lawyer asked what I wanted for the immediate future.

I said I wanted somewhere stable for the girls.

I wanted money handled transparently.

I wanted no more documents appearing with my name on them while I was in the hospital.