I was ashamed that I had trusted Julian.

Ashamed that I had quit my job.

Ashamed that I had allowed Eleanor to decide which rooms I could enter in my own home.

Ashamed, worst of all, that Noah had been frightened without my understanding how deeply.

My mother reached across the table.

“You made decisions with the information you had.

You can learn from them without turning yourself into the enemy.”

I had spent months refusing to let Julian define me.