“No one is requiring that,” he said.

“We want you to understand the plan and have reliable access to care.”

I asked whether stress had hurt the baby.

He answered cautiously, based on the assessment, without blaming me for having been frightened.

That alone nearly made me cry again.

For the next two weeks, I lived in a strange interval between comfort and disbelief.

People brought meals and asked when I wanted them cleared away.

There were flowers I had not ordered and fabrics I was afraid to stain.