But when I looked toward the doorway, he was still standing there.

And I noticed something I hadn’t wanted to acknowledge before.

I felt more comfortable holding the baby when Daniel wasn’t watching.

That frightened me almost as much as the sudden silence.

Because I could remember a time when his presence was the thing that made me feel safe.

PART 2 — THE PRICE OF A BABY

Before our son was born, Daniel and I talked about money the way most couples did.

We compared household expenses, discussed repairs, and worried about whether our income would stretch far enough once we had a baby.