“This is insane!” Madison shrieked, her silk pajamas suddenly ridiculous beside a uniformed officer. “We’re family! You can’t call the cops on us!”

“You’re Robert’s daughter,” I said, keeping my voice dangerously calm. “You are not my dependent, and you are certainly not my tenant. You’re an unwanted guest.”

Robert stepped forward, hands raised in surrender. “Officer, there’s been a misunderstanding. My daughter lost her apartment. She called me crying. What was I supposed to do?”

“You were supposed to ask your wife,” I said.

The silence that followed was heavier than lead. Robert had promised our home to his daughter without a single text, call, or whisper to me. He’d stood by while she handed me a servant’s chore list.

“We need the locks changed, Vince,” I said, gesturing to the front door. “Front, back, and the garage side door.”