I have forgiven myself for it, mostly, because the wanting-to-trust came from love, and love is not a crime.

But I will never again override that watchful voice.

I learned, at my daughter’s expense, that the small accurate alarm is almost always right, and that the comfortable explanation is almost always a door the dangerous walk through.

Chapter 3 — Everything’s Okay, Mommy

For the first few weeks, everything seemed normal.

Chloe held her drawings up to the camera on our video calls, and giggled at the lopsided braids her father attempted, and I went to sleep each night a thousand miles away believing my family was fine.

But as April wore on, the calls grew shorter.