And when all of that failed, and only then, the mask dropped and the real fear showed through, and the real fear was not have I lost you or how could you think this of me. It was don’t show those files to anyone. Every earlier message had been a performance aimed at a target.

The last one was the truth escaping, and the truth was that she had never, at any point that evening, been wondering whether I still loved her.

She had been calculating how much I knew, and how to keep me from acting on it, and thirty-eight calls’ worth of tears had all been in service of the single sentence at the end.

She loved the files.