Surviving had involved plenty of frightened and exhausted days.

At the hearing, I watched Mark enter with his attorney.

He looked thinner, but otherwise ordinary.

It disturbed me how familiar he remained.

I recognized the way he adjusted his cuffs and leaned forward when speaking.

Years of marriage do not vanish from the mind because the person you knew has done something terrible.

When I was invited to speak, I kept my eyes on the judge.

I told her that I could not know every thought Mark had during the weeks before the airport.