“Grandma is your grandma forever,” I said.

“Grandpa is your grandpa forever.

Aunt Dana is your aunt.

Nothing about who belongs to you is changing.

The only thing that’s changing is that your dad and I are not going to be married and we are not going to live in the same house.”

What we did not tell them, that day or for many years, was the why.

That was a decision we made together — the only substantive thing Luca and I agreed on in four months, and I want it on the record because it was his idea before it was mine.