And the ridiculous thing: I opened the archive.

I took the panel off entirely — not the frame, the panel — and I had a joiner in and we turned that four-by-six void into a proper little room.

Lit, ventilated, shelved floor to ceiling, with a door that has a handle on it like a door.

My father’s four hundred drawings are in it, flat now, in map drawers rather than tubes, properly.

It took three days and about eleven hundred dollars and I stood in it when it was finished and cried for about twenty minutes, and I have never been able to explain to anybody exactly why, and I have stopped trying.