Duruji first — one of which was, according to him, “a man attempting to reinstall himself as the narrator” and one of which was, he thought, probably sincere.

Toby read both and did not reply to either.

He said to me afterward, at the kitchen table: “I’m not saying never.

I’m saying not while I’m still working out what I think.”

He is eighteen now and he starts at Case in the autumn and he is going to do mechanical engineering, and his father has been in prison for three years and eleven months, and the answer is still not never and it is still not yet.

I went to therapy for two years and I want to record two things from it.