I know that.

But I also know exactly what a comment about a cookie is the first move of, because I lived through all the moves that come after it, and I decided I would rather be a mother who acted too soon than a mother who, like everyone in my own childhood, waited until it was too late and then called her inaction reasonable.

If I was wrong, the cost was a grandmother’s hurt feelings.

If I was right, the cost of waiting was a child.

That is not a close call.

It has never once been a close call.