I understood, by then, exactly what a conversation with Chad would be.

It would not be an argument I could win, because he did this for a living and I did not.

He would be reasonable where I expected anger, warm where I expected pressure, and he would find, in the space of a few minutes, whatever small opening I did not know I had — the guilt, the doubt, the wish to not be the difficult one — and he would press on it with the ease of long practice.

The only defense against a professional’s voice is not a better argument.