It is easy, from the outside, to ask why people do not just refuse, quit, or stand up for themselves against unfair treatment, and the answer is almost always that there is someone standing behind them who cannot afford for them to lose.

My dignity was a luxury I could not afford, because my dignity was not the only thing on the table; Chloe’s tuition was on the table, our rent was on the table, the lights were on the table.

A person with a cushion can afford to make a stand.

A person living without one has to weigh every stand against what it might cost the people depending on them, and usually, quietly, swallow it.

I swallowed a great deal in those years.