And I never told you, because you loved her, and because it felt like the kind of thing that would make you choose, and I couldn’t stand to lose you too.

So I just — went quiet.

On both of you.

For nine years.” I looked at my brother in the dark.

“You thought I abandoned you.

I was trying to survive her.

I’m not saying it was right.

I’m saying it wasn’t what you thought.”