She was asking whether the thing Beatrice had spent three years implying was, in fact, true.

She was asking whether she was a lesser member of her own family.

She was asking whether the love she got from Caleb was a smaller, more conditional, more provisional kind of love than the love the real grandchildren got, whether she was a visitor in her own life.

And she was asking it in the small, careful, matter-of-fact voice of a child who has already half-decided that the answer is yes, and is bracing to have it confirmed.

I opened my mouth, and I did not have it, the answer big enough for that question.