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Doctor Specializing in End-of-Life Care share insights on What People Often Say in Their Final Days

Most people would rather not think about how they might die because they fear death.

However, some people are forced to survive while facing death. Consider those receiving hospice care, sometimes known as end-of-life care, who have advanced, incurable illnesses and other conditions that will soon cause their death. Since they are caring for patients who are not expected to live a full year, you can expect the staff to be extremely depressed.

However, as end-of-life patients reach a sort of catharsis, some “end-of-life” physicians and staff find the practice inspiring.

Dr. Christopher Kerr, a doctor who studies end-of-life experiences

Most people would rather not think about how they might die because they fear death. However, some people are forced to survive while facing death. Consider those receiving hospice care, sometimes known as end-of-life care, who have advanced, incurable illnesses and other conditions that will soon cause their death. Since they are caring for patients who are not expected to live a full year, you can expect the staff to be extremely depressed.

However, as end-of-life patients reach a sort of catharsis, some health professionals and “end-of-life” staff find the practice inspiring.

Facing the fear of extinction

A man sits in a cage, smoking

Dr. Christopher Kerr is one of them and says, “Dying is this unique place that changes perception and perspective.” It naturally draws you inward.

There is reflection and people often emphasize the positive aspects of life and what matters to them. And our relationships are usually like that.”

Dr. Kerr, a palliative care physician, and his research team at Hospice & Palliative Care Buffalo have documented more than 1,500 end-of-life episodes and published studies over many years.

According to Kerr, patients often have dreams that provide comfort and a sense of closure. This may encourage them to make amends, reconnect with loved ones, or take other steps to comfort them and prepare for the goodbye.

“We’ve all been damaged in one way or another by living, and it seems we’ve been brought back together through those experiences,” Kerr noted. “And so the life you live is validated, and conversely, the fear of death seems to diminish.”

However, not all insights and dreams are calm and reassuring. Some of them can be disturbing. “But it’s these dreams that are often the most transformative or meaningful,” he noted.

See also: 5 biggest deathbed regrets according to a palliative care nurse

An adverse deathbed experience

a mother cuddles a newborn baby

Dr Christopher gave an example of this phenomenon on the Next Level Soul podcast. “We had a man in his 40s who had been incarcerated all his life. In addition to head and neck cancer, he was addicted to drugs. He was laughing and dreaming and full of joy when he suddenly bursts into tears and thinks that all the people who hurt him are stabbing him.”

“But after he came out of it, he asked to visit his daughter to apologize and show her his love. And then he died quietly.”

Parental comfort

army men sit in a transport van

One of the patients was a woman suffering from doubts and remorse that her children had been convicted of drug crimes.

However, the doctor notes that towards the end of her life, she had a very cathartic dream in which “her parents came to her and told her what a good mother she was”.

See also: The doctor is undoubtedly convinced that life goes on after death

Meeting a Veteran at the End of Life

One patient served in the teenage army in 1944 during the invasion of Normandy.

person sits on a cliffside watching the sunset

Because of this, he suffers from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) his whole life.

“He came to our unit at the end of his life … he had such a horrible experience where he saw body parts and bloody water and he was screaming and he couldn’t rest.” “You can’t die if you can’t sleep,” Kerr says. When you’re asleep, you just pass out, so it’s quite difficult.” But the man was losing his cool due to PTSD.

When he finally fell asleep one day, Kerr asked him about his dreams. “I had a fantastic dream where I experienced the happiest day of my life – the day he got his discharge papers,” she says. I had a vivid dream in which a soldier he didn’t know came up to him and said, ‘No, we’re going to get you,’ probably in Normandy.

“Post-Traumatic Growth”

a little girl in a unicorn costume sits on grass

The man died quietly in his sleep shortly afterward. This type of experience—which Dr. What Kerr called “post-traumatic growth” – occurs in people of any age, including those nearing the end of life, and is characterized by personal progress after traumatic events.

“Just because you die doesn’t mean you stop living,” he noted. “You live intensely in that last period.”

Youth and originality

According to the doctor, children have different experiences at the end of life because they do not fully understand the reality of death. They often encounter creatures that comfort them and help them feel less alone. “Kids are creative and imaginative and they access that part,” he noted.

A young child imagined his favorite things together in one environment. “She built herself a castle with a piano, a swimming pool, united animals, and a window that lets in lots of natural light.” “A safe place,” she answered my question, “what does the castle represent?”

See also: Wife warns after husband’s death linked to one energy drink a day

Link

“The doctor at the end of life reveals what it was really like in the days before death – and why there is nothing to fear.” The Sun UK. Shaw, Isabel. April 23, 2024

“Our research on end-of-life experiences.” Buttalo Hospice and Palliative Care.

“Why Deathbed Dreams and Visions Can Be Comforting for the Dying – and Those Left Behind.” Padraig Moran, CBC, 5 May 2024

Dr. Christopher Kerr’s insights into end-of-life experiences reveal a profound and often transformative aspect of the dying process. His observations, gathered from years of research at Hospice & Palliative Care Buffalo, emphasize that the final days can be not only a time of fear and despair but also moments of significant reflection and personal growth. Patients often experience comforting dreams and visions that offer them a sense of closure and reconciliation, allowing them to come to terms with the past and connect with loved ones in meaningful ways.

Not all end-of-life experiences are peaceful, however; some patients face deep-seated fears and regrets. Examples of Dr. The Kerrs illustrate how these challenging moments can lead to profound personal revelations and healing. For example, traumatized or regretful individuals often find comfort and understanding in their final dreams, which can facilitate a sense of resolution and acceptance before death.

Research by Dr. Kerra emphasizes that dying does not negate the value of life lived. Instead, it often focuses more on the importance of our relationships, our successes, and even our failures. The emotional and psychological shifts observed during this period highlight the resilience of the human spirit and its ability to grow even in the face of death.

Overall, the work of Dr. Kerry offers a hopeful perspective on end-of-life experiences, suggesting that this final phase can be a time of meaningful reflection and inner peace. His findings encourage us to view the end of life not just as a conclusion, but as an opportunity for deep personal transformation and connection.

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