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I Incited a Thanksgiving Filled with ‘Yelling’ and ‘Crying’ Because My Boyfriend’s Mom Repeatedly Called Me the Wrong Name

Navigating relationships, especially when past ties linger in a partner’s family, can be a formidable challenge. In this Reddit dilemma, a woman found herself constantly scorned by her boyfriend’s mother, who had deep feelings for her son’s ex-partner. Despite repeated instances of being called the wrong name and apparent insensitivity, the woman tried to handle the situation with understanding and patience.

However, an incident during Thanksgiving involving a turkey swap led to a dramatic fallout, leaving the woman feeling estranged from her boyfriend and wondering about the future of their relationship. A search for opinions from the online community found differing opinions, with some praising her response as a brave stand against ongoing disrespect, while others suggested alternative approaches to the solution. This scenario highlights the complexity of family ties and the delicate balance between asserting oneself and maintaining peace in relationships.

The woman couldn’t figure out why her boyfriend was so upset with her and why their family Thanksgiving had gone so wrong. To find out if she was to blame, she took to Reddit.

A 30-year-old woman was dating a man who broke up with his high school sweetheart just a year before they started dating. Although he moved on from this relationship, his family members did not feel the same way.

The mother of the woman’s boyfriend was devastated by the breakup with his childhood sweetheart. Because she grew up with them, the older woman felt like the friend’s ex-girlfriend was part of their family. The couple decided it was time to end their relationship and parted amicably as they grew apart in age. But that didn’t stop the woman’s boyfriend’s mother from taking out her frustrations on her.

How did her boyfriend’s mother treat her?
The woman knew that it might take some time for his family to get used to him dating someone else, so she entered the relationship. Things would get better, she reasoned, because his mother needed to get to know her.

But that was not the situation. During the first year of their relationship, the woman claimed that her boyfriend’s mother would refer to her by his former name. She revealed:

That is, until [my boyfriend] got mad and told her to stop being mean. She shrugged and called it just a habit. Even after the woman’s boyfriend’s mother stopped calling her by her ex-girlfriend’s name, she continued to mispronounce her name. The woman would be called Jenny by her instead of Janet and so on.

The woman corrected her boyfriend’s mother on the first few occasions. She stopped correcting the older woman when she called her the wrong name when she realized it looked like he enjoyed causing her pain.

In addition to everything the woman had to go through with her boyfriend’s mother, she was confused and upset when she found herself in a difficult situation during an important vacation.

What happens during Thanksgiving?

A woman was at her friend’s sister’s house for a barbecue a few weeks before Thanksgiving. She was in the kitchen with her husband, one of her boyfriend’s two sisters, and his mother.

While they were standing there, her boyfriend’s sister told her brother how much his girlfriend’s cooking had impressed his brother-in-law. As the woman’s friend’s mother listened, she wryly suggested that she prepare the turkey for Thanksgiving.

But once again she was referring to the woman incorrectly – calling her Janet rather than Jenny.

Although the woman’s friend’s sisters giggled at her mother’s suggestion, she said:

“That’s a great idea!”

The woman was prepared to take decisive action to ensure that her boyfriend’s mother could no longer refer to her incorrectly. A few weeks later on Thanksgiving Day, her boyfriend’s mother’s house reached a breaking point.

Everyone was surprised when the woman and her boyfriend showed up with the usual wine and dessert and revealed that she hadn’t brought the turkey that had been talked about for weeks before Thanksgiving.

The woman claimed that because her boyfriend’s mother had mentioned the other woman’s name weeks earlier when talking about the day, she assumed Janet was bringing the turkey.

She admitted:

“There was screaming, crying, and then they kicked us out.”

The woman went on to say that she had not heard from her boyfriend since that evening and that she thought their relationship might be over. But she wanted to know if netizens thought she was wrong for what she did.

She quickly found that she was far from believing that she was mistaken, but many people hailed her as a hero for handling the matter, telling her that her boyfriend’s mother had done far worse things to her than calling her the wrong name.

Some argued that the older woman was trying in vain and that her actions were only significant enough to convince her boyfriend’s mother of her mistakes. Others believed she should have stood up to the woman.

A few comments from readers

Navigating family dynamics, especially with a partner’s deeply intertwined past, can be a tricky journey. In this Reddit story, a woman found herself at odds with her boyfriend’s family, particularly his mother, who was trying to leave her son’s previous relationship. Despite the constant back-and-forth and subtle animosity, the tipping point came during the pivotal Thanksgiving gathering. Faced with a moment to make a statement, the woman decided to withhold the turkey, a symbolic act of defiance against repeated disrespect. The fallout, marked by emotional turmoil and alienation, left her questioning the state of her relationship. As online communities offered their perspectives, differing opinions highlighted the complexity of family conflict and how individuals respond to perceived insults. While some saw her actions as justifiable retaliation, others advocated direct confrontation. This story highlighted the challenges of setting boundaries in complex family dynamics and the delicate balance between asserting yourself and keeping the peace in relationships. Ultimately, it encourages reflection on the importance of communication and compromise in resolving family tensions.

1 thought on “I Incited a Thanksgiving Filled with ‘Yelling’ and ‘Crying’ Because My Boyfriend’s Mom Repeatedly Called Me the Wrong Name”

  1. This story is too convoluted and garbled. Whoever wrote it either does not have a proper grasp of the written language or speaks it as a second language. When you interchange “he” and “she” it becomes banal, confusing, and stupid blah blah blah

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