Keanu Reeves Will not Present Whoopi Goldberg’s Lifetime Accomplishment Grant: “She’s Not a Decent Individual”

Keanu Reeves is perhaps of the most delightful, most certified individual in Hollywood. Whoopi Goldberg, then again, was as of late casted a ballot “most couldn’t stand individual” in Hollywood, a qualification no one is by all accounts ready to disprove.

Reeves was decided to introduce the current year’s Lifetime Accomplishment grant by the television Creation Board of trustees, a job he was respected to take on… until he heard that he’d need to share the stage and present the honor to Whoopi Goldberg.

“She’s not a pleasant individual,” expressed Reeves in a voice that nearly seemed like he was tending to Rufus outside the Circle K, “I would rather not be recognized as the person who committed that error.”

Justin Timberlake, Wynona Ryder, and Gloria Estefan additionally declined. They’re actually holding on to hear back from Jackie and Kelso, who frantically need something else to occur in their lives, however no one is by all accounts ready to track down them.

“We accept those two are presumably in a gorge some place in the wake of losing their online entertainment following to the most obviously terrible expression of remorse video at any point recorded,” said Gorge Chief Joe Barron of the 136th Marine Paralegal Unit, “We’re about to begin here in LA and go from one gorge to another until we track down them.”

Others accept that they may likewise be in a shallower thing, like a trench or even a puddle, yet everybody concurs they are reasonable dead from shame, joining their vocations. Topher Beauty was inaccessible for input, by and by leaving his poise in one piece.

Reeves said it’s absolutely impossible that he’ll alter his perspective, regardless of how moronic the story gets. God Favor America.