It is terrifying to think of losing a beloved father or grandfather, and many individuals find it quite difficult to cope with such situations.
But one dad was horrified to find that once his children learned of his condition, they began arguing over their future inheritance rather than feeling sorry for him. The father decided to post his story on Reddit, where he received much-needed encouragement from other users.
The man recounted his experience.
I am sixty-three years old. By taking advantage of the favorable economic conditions, I was able to accumulate enough funds for savings, enjoy a comfortable retirement, and provide my children with a solid inheritance.
But what they have done recently has broken my heart.
My eldest daughter is married to another lawyer and practices law. My third son became an engineer, the youngest son works as a salesman and the second son is also a lawyer.
My prognosis is cancer and I may not have much time left. My children started cutting each other’s backs to try to get their inheritance before they knew it. At first, there were a lot of verbal exchanges that escalated into lawsuits.
The last straw was when, while I was being treated in the hospital, my daughter signed documents under false pretenses to get her brother’s share of the inheritance. Now the siblings can only communicate through lawyers and are unable to look each other in the eye.
I decided to spend the money despite my sadness at the situation, believing that once it was all gone, they would have no further incentive to fight. I made charitable donations, bought my wife cosmetics, paid for our vacations together, gave my grandchildren expensive gifts, and bought my closest friends and coworkers better tools for their jobs. Among other things, we paid in advance for my funeral and bought a large television.
About 65-70% of my savings are already used up. I want to leave my wife a respectable amount of money to last me the time I have left.
But my kids started noticing that I was spending a lot of money and started asking questions.
My daughter independently deduced what happened. I was unable to refute her accusations as I am guilty of all of them, but she went on to say that my selfish actions would cause her children to suffer and that I was also cursing all of her grandchildren.
This led me to think—perhaps I was too self-absorbed to see it sooner—that my grandchildren should not have to pay the price for their parents’ misdeeds. That’s my problem.
Internet users sympathized with the poster.
What did she accuse you of? Are you using YOUR own resources? that you deserved it? For the desired life?
What you get when someone dies is an inheritance. You don’t own it. It’s not up to you.
Only when you actually inherit something can you decide what happens?
Until the day you die, you can reorganize who gets what. Alternatively, give your grandchildren a trust that their parents don’t have access to. You’re fine. Simply give everything to your husband.
But this is the correct procedure.
I can’t convince my mother-in-law to spend her money. She owns it. Bus trips with her senior community are “too expensive” so she won’t even go on them. That woman earns more annually from investments, superannuation funds, and pension payments than my husband and I put together – and yet we get along just fine.
Her concern is to pay $10 for her grandchildren. She is constantly encouraged by me to travel. to purchase the desired item. She is eighty years old. Enjoy it.
Are you implying that a salesman, engineer, lawyer, or attorney is unable to support his family and must rely on inheritance? Remind them that it’s their money and that they should save money for their grandchildren because ultimately you’re not in charge of their fate.
Your children are trying to convince you that you should feel obligated to support them in some way.
It is not true. Your children are telling you that you shouldn’t enjoy and spend the money you and your wife have earned over the years, but they are also showing that they don’t want to take risks or make sacrifices. to support the future of their own children.
I informed my parents that as an adult who should support myself and my family, I hoped they would spend every penny they earned on themselves and asked them not to try to save anything for me.
I received a large inheritance. If I could have my dad back, I would give him everything back.
I think you are taking it too extreme. Indeed. It would be easy to simply change your will to reflect your true wishes regarding the distribution of your assets.
However, since you have earned money, you should eventually spend it to make you happy. Your grandchildren won’t experience any hardship either. All of your children seem to have excellent economic potential and the means to support their offspring.
I understand you are trying to see the bright side of a difficult situation, but you made sure your wife was taken care of. If your children do not recognize their parental responsibility to care for their own children independently of you, then they have no right to demand that you pay for them – for the benefit of their own children no less.
The family may have been completely broken by your money. Now that they’re unhappy with how you’ve managed your own money, this can serve as a springboard for them to find common ground again. Although it’s not always pleasant to believe, their mutual enmity could potentially bring them closer.
It is traditional to leave an inheritance to children and grandchildren, but sometimes family members may have unreasonable expectations and do not deserve the money. A similar situation was experienced by a British grandfather who left his grandchildren just £50 and had no intention of visiting him during his illness.
In this heart-wrenching story, a father’s experience underscores the fragility of family bonds when faced with the temptation of an inheritance. The man’s decision to post his story on Reddit reveals his deep dismay and grief at the actions of his children, who prioritized future wealth over family solidarity and compassion. His story is not just a personal lament, but a cautionary tale of how money can sometimes become a divisive force in families, rather than a means of support and love.
The father’s narrative vividly illustrates his inner struggle. He worked hard to provide a comfortable future for his family, only to witness them tear each other apart over a potential inheritance. This betrayal led him to take drastic measures, spending his savings in ways that brought him and his wife immediate joy and comfort rather than the money fueling further discord between his children. This decision, although extreme, was rooted in a desire to remove his children’s motivation to fight, although it also revealed the unintended consequence of depriving his grandchildren.
Responses from the online community offered a mix of sympathy and practical advice. Many users supported the father’s right to spend his money as he saw fit, stressing that inheritance is not an entitlement but a gift. They proposed alternatives, such as the establishment of trusts for grandchildren, which would bypass child greed and ensure the benefit of the younger generation directly. This reflects a broader understanding that although the father’s actions were radical, they were driven by the need to find peace in the remaining time and protect his legacy from further damage.
The broader implications of this story are profound. It challenges traditional expectations of heredity and questions the moral responsibility of both parents and children. The father’s narrative forces us to think about the nature of family obligations and the true value of financial security versus emotional and relational wealth. His actions, while controversial, emphasize a crucial point: that wealth should ideally be a means of support and unification, not division and destruction.
In closing, this moving story serves as a reminder of the complex dynamics that money can bring to family relationships. It emphasizes the importance of clear communication and mutual respect in matters of heritage. My father’s decision to spend his savings to avoid further litigation, although drastic, was a profound statement of his values and priorities.
It reminds us that the greatest legacy a person can leave is not material wealth, but a legacy of love, unity, and shared memories. Ultimately, this story is a call to introspect on how we manage our resources and relationships, challenging us to prioritize compassion and understanding over material gain.