The Date That Came With an Invoice
At first, it felt like a love story that could restore your faith in dating. A polite man, a candlelit dinner, a bouquet of roses — everything seemed almost too perfect.
But what started as a charming first date quickly unraveled into something far darker and more unsettling than I ever expected. By the next morning, my phone buzzed with an email that made my blood run cold — an invoice. Yes, an actual bill for the date I’d just been on.
A Picture-Perfect First Date
When my best friend Mia offered to set me up with her boyfriend’s friend, I hesitated. Blind dates weren’t exactly my thing, but Mia insisted.
“You’ll love him,” she said confidently. “He’s respectful, intelligent, and totally stable.”
Against my better judgment, I agreed. His name was Eric. From our first conversation, he seemed thoughtful — the kind of man who used punctuation and full sentences, not emojis and one-word replies.
After a week of light chatting, he invited me to dinner at a cozy Italian restaurant downtown.
The evening couldn’t have gone better. Eric arrived early, dressed sharply, and handed me a bouquet of red roses. “These are for you,” he said, smiling sincerely. Inside, he pulled out my chair, complimented my outfit, and even surprised me with a small engraved keychain featuring the first letter of my name.
For a moment, I thought Mia might have been right. Eric was charming, attentive, and genuinely interested. Conversation flowed effortlessly — from travel stories to embarrassing online dating tales.
When the check arrived, I instinctively reached for my purse, but he stopped me. “A man pays on the first date,” he said with a proud grin, handing his card to the waiter. It was a little old-fashioned, but I didn’t mind.
After dinner, he walked me to my car, waited for me to start the engine, and wished me goodnight. No weird comments, no pushy behavior. Just… nice. On the drive home, I texted Mia: You might be right about this one.
The Invoice That Shattered the Fairytale
The next morning, the fairytale shattered.
I woke up to an email with the subject line: “Invoice for Last Night.”
At first, I thought it was a joke — maybe a meme or playful reference to the dinner bill. But when I opened it, my jaw dropped. The document looked shockingly professional — logo, itemized charges, and a total at the bottom.
Each line listed “expenses” from the night:
Dinner: $120 — “Covered in full.”
Flowers: “Requires reciprocation (one hug).”
Keychain: “Repayable via coffee date.”
Emotional labor: “Holding hands next time to express gratitude.”
At the bottom, in bold:
“Failure to comply may result in Chris hearing about it.”
Chris. As in Mia’s boyfriend — Eric’s friend.
I stared at the screen, disgusted. This wasn’t a joke or awkward flirtation — it was manipulation dressed up as humor. I texted Mia: You’re not going to believe this.
Within minutes, she responded: Oh my God. He’s insane. Don’t reply.
Karma Strikes Back
Mia didn’t stop there. She told Chris — and together, they hatched a perfect way to return the favor.
That afternoon, Chris sent Eric a fake invoice of his own. It looked completely legitimate, featuring a mock law firm header: “Karma & Co.”
The charges?
Emotional disturbance fee: For making a woman uncomfortable.
Public embarrassment surcharge: For acting like a creep on a date.
Service charge: “For sitting across from someone way out of your league.”
At the bottom, in bold:
“Failure to comply will result in permanent reputation damage. No refunds.”
Eric completely lost it. He bombarded me with texts — angry, defensive, self-pitying:
“You’re overreacting.”
“It was supposed to be funny.”
“You just can’t take a joke.”
And finally: “You missed out on a great guy.”
I didn’t respond — just sent a single thumbs-up emoji and blocked his number.
Later, Mia called, laughing so hard she could barely speak. “I swear I didn’t know he was that unhinged,” she said.
The Lesson Learned
Looking back, I can almost laugh at how absurd it all was. The date had started like a scene from a romantic comedy and ended like a warning about modern dating — where charm can be weaponized and “kindness” comes with hidden terms and conditions.
If nothing else, I learned something priceless: when someone treats respect like a transaction, walk away before the receipt shows up.
Now, when people ask about my worst date, I just smile and say:
“The one who sent me an invoice.”
It always gets a laugh — but I make sure to add:
“He thought I’d pay. Instead, I paid attention.”
And that lesson? Worth every penny I never spent.