Later, Ruth told me he had asked her for David’s contact details and whether she knew what the trucking company might pay.

“I gave him no information about your affairs,” she said.

She did not claim that keeping a telephone number from him would prevent a public-record search.

She was setting the boundary she could control.

At a support group one evening, Ruth stayed beside me after most people had gone.

The coffee was cold and the folding chairs made sitting still uncomfortable.

I had said very little during the meeting.