She was not shouting when she said it.

The version people repeat has her screaming it, and she did shout at me that evening — about four times, about the paramedics, about the neighbours — but not that.

She said that quietly, in a reasonable voice, as an explanation she expected to be accepted, and that is the part that I cannot get out from under.

She had thought about it.

At some point in the twenty-three minutes between our daughter going down on that tile and my key going into that lock, Patricia Ocaña had constructed a position, and the position was that Daniela was breathing and would get up, and she had decided that this was sufficient, and she was prepared to say it out loud to a man on his knees.