They Mistook My Grief for Weakness and My Silence for Permission — Until a Uniformed Officer Saluted Me at My Own Door
And by Thanksgiving, they had stopped asking me anything at all.
They had simply begun announcing decisions already made.
I have thought a great deal since about how that translation error happens — how a person can say nothing, and have it heard as yes — because it is the mechanism that traps so many people in their own homes and their own families, and it trapped me for the better part of a year.
The problem is that silence has no fixed meaning.