Millie Smith and Lewis Cann learned they were expecting twin girls, but only one would survive.
Smith gave birth to identical twins Callie and Skye on April 30 after a high-risk 30-week pregnancy. Skye lived for just three hours.
While Callie spent the night in a NICU incubator under the care of her parents, another mother of healthy twins told Smith she was “so lucky” not to have two babies.
The comment left her devastated, and she struggled to respond. It was then she noticed a purple butterfly symbol, which later came to represent Skye’s memory and support for grieving parents.
The couple was supported by a bereavement midwife and a “Daisy Room,” a space where families can spend time with a baby before and after death. Smith recalled that both babies cried at birth, something doctors had not expected for Skye.
“We were cuddling Skye when she passed away. It was the worst moment of our lives,” she said. “I have never felt heartbreak like that before. But I’m proud she fought for as long as she could to be with us.”
Callie was one of several premature twins being cared for in the NICU. Over time, Smith noticed conversations around Skye fading as staff and families moved on, leaving new parents unaware of what had happened.
Weeks later, the same “you’re so lucky” comment was made again by another exhausted parent, unaware of her situation. Smith said the moment nearly broke her, leading her to leave the room in tears. She later said a simple symbol could have prevented the misunderstanding.
That experience inspired her to create a visual system for neonatal units, where a purple butterfly on an incubator would indicate the loss of one or more babies in a multiple birth.
She explained she chose butterflies to represent babies “who have flown away,” and purple because it is neutral for both boys and girls.
The idea grew into the Skye High Foundation, which has helped introduce the purple butterfly initiative in hospitals across multiple countries.
Callie, now 7, is thriving, while Skye’s memory continues through awareness programs and purple butterfly keepsakes that support bereaved families.
Smith has also acknowledged that while loss cannot be prevented, better awareness and support systems can ease the experience for grieving parents, calling it “the hardest thing anyone has to deal with.”